Number 5 is alive!
Just some observations.
userdrake has some missing libs (mostly X), and finally gives the following error:
BEGIN failed--compilation aborted at /usr/sbin/userdrake line 29
(Line 29 is "use transfugdrake;")
I used useradd to add my user, then set the passwd from the root account.
I didn't realize British keyboard was enabled until I went to edit /etc/apt/sources.list. I changed it to US. (Yeah, I know you're in UK.) It's set to ibiblio, so I changed the source to debian.ethz.ch. After that, I rebooted to runlevel 1 so I could set root's password again.
/root folder has Desktop, Documents, Downloads, drakx, Music, Pictures, Templates, tmp & Videos. /etc/skel folder has Documents, Downloads, Movies, Music, Pictures & tmp
I installed less, htop & mc, as I especially can't live without less.
There are a lot fewer unmet dependencies shown by apt-cache:
Don't know how you did it. Tried to apt-get -D remove all those packages, but they're actually not installed.