Proposal to fix UK Economy

[Just17]

With some little alterations this letter would seem to provide an answer to a lot of our countries' economies!


Letter to Mr. Cameron

    
    
    Dear Mr. Cameron,

    Please find below our suggestion for fixing the UK's economy.

    Instead of giving billions of pounds to banks that will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan.

    You can call it the Patriotic Retirement Plan:

    There are about 10 million people over 50 in the work force.

    Pay them £1 million each severance for early retirement with the following stipulations:

    1) They MUST retire.
    Ten million job openings - unemployment fixed

    2) They MUST buy a new British car.
    Ten million cars ordered - Car Industry fixed

    3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage -
    Housing Crisis fixed

    4) They MUST send their kids to school/college/university -
    Crime rate fixed

    5) They MUST buy £100 WORTH of groceries/alcohol/tobacco a week .....
    And there's your money back in duty/tax etc

    6) They must lodge the money in a designated bank.
        Bank crisis averted, as the banks get instantly recapitalised by depositors.

    It can't get any easier than that!

    P.S. If more money is needed, have all members of parliament pay back their falsely claimed expenses and second home allowances

   Yours sincerely,

A concerned citizen

***

    Also.....

    Let's put the pensioners in jail and the criminals in a nursing home.

    This way the pensioners would have access to showers, hobbies and walks.

    They'd receive unlimited free prescriptions, dental and medical treatment, wheel chairs etc and they'd receive money instead of paying it out.

    They would have constant video monitoring, so they could be helped instantly, if they fell, or needed assistance.

    Bedding would be washed twice a week, and all clothing would be ironed and returned to them.

    A guard would check on them every 20 minutes and bring their meals and snacks to their room.

    They would have family visits in a suite built for that purpose.

    They would have access to a library, weight room, spiritual counseling, pool and education.

    Simple clothing, shoes, slippers, PJ's and legal aid would be free, on request.

    Private, secure rooms for all, with an outdoor exercise yard and gardens.

    Each senior could have a PC, a TV, a radio and daily phone calls.

    There would be a board of directors to hear complaints, and the guards would have a code of conduct that would be strictly adhered to.



    The criminals would get cold food, be left all alone and unsupervised. Lights off at 8pm, and showers once a week. Live in a tiny room and pay £600.00 per week and have no hope of ever getting out.

    Think about this (more points of contention):


    COWS
    Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Appleby almost three years previously, right to the stall where she slept, in the county of Cumbria?

    And, they even tracked her calves to their stalls.

  But they are unable to locate 125,000 illegal immigrants wandering around our country.

  Maybe we should give each of them a cow and then track them down ......

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

[muungwana]

i see a few problems with this:

Somebody will cry foul on civil liberties when they are required to buy a new car when they prefer to buy an old one.

A law suit from foreign car manufacturer to some international body responsible for international trade will filed crying foul on artificial limitations on foreign car sales.

What are your plans for those 10 million people who are still capable to do work? They have to be doing something.Whatever they do,you have to also require them not to find employment,or do anything would have given somebody else paid work.   

Who decides "designated bank",banks on the list would most certain complain.

[YouCanToo]

With some little alterations this letter would seem to provide an answer to a lot of our countries' economies!


Letter to Mr. Cameron

    
    
    Dear Mr. Cameron,

    Please find below our suggestion for fixing the UK's economy.

    Instead of giving billions of pounds to banks that will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan.

    You can call it the Patriotic Retirement Plan:

    There are about 10 million people over 50 in the work force.

    Pay them £1 million each severance for early retirement with the following stipulations:

    1) They MUST retire.
    Ten million job openings - unemployment fixed

    2) They MUST buy a new British car.
    Ten million cars ordered - Car Industry fixed

    3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage -
    Housing Crisis fixed

    4) They MUST send their kids to school/college/university -
    Crime rate fixed

    5) They MUST buy £100 WORTH of groceries/alcohol/tobacco a week .....
    And there's your money back in duty/tax etc

    6) They must lodge the money in a designated bank.
        Bank crisis averted, as the banks get instantly recapitalised by depositors.

    It can't get any easier than that!

    P.S. If more money is needed, have all members of parliament pay back their falsely claimed expenses and second home allowances

Not if, it should be they will pay all their falsely claimed expenses and second home allowances. And they shall get no pay increases without the majority of the peoples vote. (Especially in the USA)

   Yours sincerely,

A concerned citizen

***

    Also.....

    Let's put the pensioners in jail and the criminals in a nursing home.

    This way the pensioners would have access to showers, hobbies and walks.

    They'd receive unlimited free prescriptions, dental and medical treatment, wheel chairs etc and they'd receive money instead of paying it out.

    They would have constant video monitoring, so they could be helped instantly, if they fell, or needed assistance.

    Bedding would be washed twice a week, and all clothing would be ironed and returned to them.

    A guard would check on them every 20 minutes and bring their meals and snacks to their room.

    They would have family visits in a suite built for that purpose.

    They would have access to a library, weight room, spiritual counseling, pool and education.

    Simple clothing, shoes, slippers, PJ's and legal aid would be free, on request.

    Private, secure rooms for all, with an outdoor exercise yard and gardens.

    Each senior could have a PC, a TV, a radio and daily phone calls.

    There would be a board of directors to hear complaints, and the guards would have a code of conduct that would be strictly adhered to.



    The criminals would get cold food, be left all alone and unsupervised. Lights off at 8pm, and showers once a week. Live in a tiny room and pay £600.00 per week and have no hope of ever getting out.

    Think about this (more points of contention):


    COWS
    Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Appleby almost three years previously, right to the stall where she slept, in the county of Cumbria?

    And, they even tracked her calves to their stalls.

  But they are unable to locate 125,000 illegal immigrants wandering around our country.

  Maybe we should give each of them a cow and then track them down ......

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

All too sad but true!

[GermanTux]

All western economies are gorged on debt, and in the process of running a ponzie scheme where growth is made through printing mass amounts of tender equally.  You cannot ship your industrial bases to East Asia, and then wonder why unemployment is a problem. 

The crushing burden of the welfare state does not help either. 

[ppiklapp]

I agree that the idea has merit and unfortunately will not be even considered as 1) it makes too much sense, 2) it is too easy to execute, and 3) just might work.  If it would work, it would throw all the economic idiots out of work, after all if we did something that worked economically, the gloom and doom economists would have to actually find real work.

[Just17]

i see a few problems with this:

Somebody will cry foul on civil liberties when they are required to buy a new car when they prefer to buy an old one.

Naw ....  they have been given the means 'to eat cake'

A law suit from foreign car manufacturer to some international body responsible for international trade will filed crying foul on artificial limitations on foreign car sales.

They can do the same for their home market 

What are your plans for those 10 million people who are still capable to do work? They have to be doing something.Whatever they do,you have to also require them not to find employment,or do anything would have given somebody else paid work.   

Lots of unpaid work in open source and Linux development and promotion!

Who decides "designated bank",banks on the list would most certain complain.

Already decided .....  the same banks who have or will be getting the money directly from the gov/taxpayer to 'bail them out' 

[Reb]

  "  2) They MUST buy a new British car.
    Ten million cars ordered - Car Industry fixed"

ah hem, which British car can they buy ?

 

[kjpetrie]

We'd have ten million people available for cheap work. That should be enough to set up a car industry.

Sadly, depositors' money isn't bank capital because it goes on the balance sheet as a debt and liability. It creates the need for capital in case of a run.

10 million million is £10 trillion (in US and financial parlance - £10 real billion but no one uses those any more). That's a rather big national debt.

I've got a better idea. Draw all the money in and share it out equally. Then, when I've spent all mine, draw it all in again...

None of this really matters. You can't eat money. What matters is whether we can grow and distribute enough food and other necessities and the price is just an illusion to hide the shortage.

[bicol_willem]

All western economies are gorged on debt, and in the process of running a ponzie scheme where growth is made through printing mass amounts of tender equally.  You cannot ship your industrial bases to East Asia, and then wonder why unemployment is a problem. 

The crushing burden of the welfare state does not help either. 

You would rather choose to send these victims/beneficiaries to the gutter a la undeveloped countries?
That the greed's shipped their activities to East Asia is not their fault. Greed's dream seems to be creating "East Asia circumstances" AKA "poverty" so that they can come back and have their dollar a day labor back again when things warm up in East Asia. No price is to high to avoid this.

[Lucky Blue]

View 1:
If you are selling your labor or skills, you may choose who you deal with as employer or contractor.
If you have money to invest then you choose where.
But, if you want to buy a product, then buy one from your own country as no price is too high to avoid giving a job to an East Asian.
View 2:
Each economic decision is with the person making it.  There is a lot wrong with this but no other system works.     

[bicol_willem]

If you are selling your labor or skills, you may choose who you deal with as employer or contractor.

NOT when you're hungry ....

[weg]

Perhaps inappropriate but don't take this TOO much to heart, weg....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wq_lhlIn1e0

[Just17]

This thread was started with a joke but it has taken an unacceptable turn to me, so I am locking it ....  up to a moderator to intervene if they think they must.